By David Scott
Boston Sports Media Watch

We agree with point 10 C. of King, Peter from The Once King of All Magazines that it was wrong to boo David Ortiz last weekend considering the season is just 1/14th toward completion.

That, however, doesn’t spare us from booing the NESN (Slow) Trigger Pullers who have now gone more than a dozen NESN games without a replacement for sideline reporter, Tina Cervasio. Despite rumblings of screen tests and fired beauty queens being looked at, there has yet to be a puff of smoke out of the Arsenal Street chimney and time-is-a-wasting.

Dutiful Don Orsillo has been picking up some of the workload usually reserved for the purdy hostess and knowing what we know about the frugal Fenway Broadcasters, we’re guessing Don-O isn’t getting more Cash-O for his Efforts-O.

How difficult can the process be anyway? Pick the most qualified, least likely to embarrass, Barbie Doll, insert microphone in right hand and watch the Pavlovian Viewers drool. The strategy is as transparent as can be and has been a proven practice by since Joel Feld set foot in the NESN doors.

However, as one Arsenal Observer cautioned: “They can’t just stick anyone in there - especially with Tito’s post-game interview as part of the deal.”

Francona, we’re told, doesn’t suffer fools well and he doesn’t care how many tiaras they’ve worn on how many runways. With well over one hundred post-game chats with The Skipper still to be held this season, NESN can’t afford to have an empty blouse asking the sometimes sensitive questions about pitching decisions and pinch-hit opportunities.

But they also can’t afford to be without a third member of the game’s broadcast crew, something the viewers now not only expect but, with the right hire, will embrace. The sooner as TV Tom Werner and the gang hurry up and hire her (or, and we giggle when we write it) him, the better.

• This one struck us as a bit odd:

A Regan Communications flack was pitching this story around town this week and it makes us wonder what other kind of “deals” the Entercommies are “brokerin”:

For Immediate Release

WRKO Brokers Deal Between Red Sox Closer Jonathan Papelbon and Prime Motor Group

Boston, MA (April 17, 2008) - Prime Motor Group today announced that Red Sox star closer Jonathan Papelbon has signed on as the automotive group’s exclusive spokesperson.

The deal, brokered by WRKO, the radio partner of the Boston Red Sox, and Mediastruction, includes several components. Papelbon will voice Prime Motor Group’s radio spots in the Boston market and be featured in signage throughout the dealerships, in addition to other promotional elements.

“I’m really excited to be a part of the Prime Motor Group family and I’m looking forward to working with them in the future,” said Red Sox Closer, Jonathan Papelbon.

Prime Motor Group, based in Westwood, consists of Audi-Porsche in Westwood, Mercedes in Westwood, Acura in Walpole, Toyota - Scion and Honda in West Roxbury/Dedham, and Infiniti in Hanover. The company is also part of a group of dealerships in Maine under the same name.

“This is a winning partnership,” said David Rosenberg, President of Prime Motor Group. “Papelbon is certainly a fan favorite and we’re thrilled to have him representing our brand.”

. . . Any pretense that may have remained about WEEI being a news organization of any sort is now forever erased with the Big, Bad (Jason) Wolfe and Killer Julie Kahn “brokering” deals with athletes it “covers.”

Both “Es” in ‘EEI stand for “Entertainment” - or as much entertainment as that woeful crew can provide.

• Late word from a Morrissey Boulevard Mole is that Jackie MacMullan may not be the only visible defector in this round of buyouts. It seems that a certain Globie has been dancing with one of the Web Biggies for a possible baseball gig. Making the possible move even juicier is the fact that another visible scribe from the market is in the running for the very same spot.

This all sounds a bit too “Inside Track,” and we apologize for the anonymity, but trust us, it is happening and it is, once again, it provides a great example of the moves being made or plotted by newspaper “veterans” who are running scared from the sinking newsprint ships.

• Already some heavy bidding on the supposed Big Papi shirt unearthed at new Yankees Stadium. They were lucky they didn’t dig up Georgie Boy with that stunt. And where the heck was Geraldo Rivera to host it for YES?

• Here’s Shots gratis “Reporter Resource of the Month”: Boycott: Stolen Dreams of the 1980 Moscow Olympic Games by Jerry Caraccioli and Tom Caraccioli. The Caracciolis strike again and this time they have the wisdom of Walter F. Mondale as their foreword for the book that is as timely as they come. The authors, we’ve been told, are available for interviews and/or insight through their publisher’s contact: Randy Walker (Rwalker@newchapterpressmedia.com).

• Miguel Tejada, according to ESPN’s “award-winning journalist” Tom Farrey, lied about his age. This will likely lead to a flood of stories about age-lies but none will have the ambush impact of what Farrey did:

The transcript, according to the ESPN PR peeps:

Tom: And how old are you?
Miguel: Me?

Tom: Yes.
Miguel: 32.

Tom: Born in?
Miguel: The Dominican Republic. Bani.

Tom: In which year?
Miguel: 1976.

Tom: 1976.
Miguel: Yeah.

Tom: You sure?
Miguel: Why I have to lie?

Tom: We acquired the document, the birth certificate that your father filed when you were a boy, and um, let me show it to you, because I want you to explain it.
Miguel: You know, can you … Who is that?

Tom: This is a birth certificate. Your birth certificate, right?
Miguel: Who give you that?

Tom: The Dominican Government
Miguel: Hmmm…

Tom: Is that you?
Miguel: Probably…

Tom: Is that an actual document? Is this your birth certificate?
Miguel: Hey, I’m not supposed to be here to talk about this. I’m sorry, you don’t need to bring me over here to talk about my personal stuff.

Tom: Well, this is kind of important, actually.
Miguel: Well, I don’t know if this is important, cause I right now I just play baseball bro. I just play baseball. I don’t have to be here to talk about this. I don’t need nobody messing to my head right now.

Tom: Does the federal government know your real name and birth date?
Miguel: I don’t know (Gets up and walks away…)

• The re-vamped NECN.com has re-launched its sports page under a new url and is calling it The Boston Score. For now, it’s the Boston Bore, but we’re willing to give the concept another looksie in the coming weeks and months. Said “Neckin’s” Director of Digital Media, Ted McEnroe, via email: “The (Boston Score) blog will continue to grow over the coming months (it is definitely a work in progress) — and [full-time anchors] Chris (Collins) and Mike (Giardi) will be the quarterbacks, regularly contributing reports both when they are in the station and when they are out in the field, where we want to take advantage of new technologies that allow them to send back quick videos for posting. We’ll be building it all out over the coming months.

“Both talent and producers are contributing to the site,” wrote McEnroe, who has been one of several posters at the Score. “The thought process is that while the anchors are the faces of NECN Sports, we have a much larger team which is plugged into the New England sports scene, so it only makes sense to tap into that larger pool of talent.”

That concept is a solid one, however just as not everyone can be on air, not everyone can be contributing bloggers - especially not all at once. In theory, more is better. But in practice, less is more - especially in an already crowded Boston blogosphere. The balance will come in time, we’re guessing.

. . . McEnroe was formerly the Executive News Producer at NECN, but slid over to the digital side with the re-launch of NECN.com’s independent site launch on January 1 (when it broke from its web alliance with the Globe).

• Still a chance that Jackie Mack could be used on NESN programming even after her Globe g’bye, but as she inferred when the news came out about her departure, the goal isn’t to do more work. It’s to do less mediaing and more momming.

• I think I’ll be going with the National broadcasts of the Celts, although I would enjoy a technological feature that allowed me to have marvelous Mike Gorman on play-by-play and whoever the Network is using on color. Tommy’s still too much and Donnie Marshall’s not yet enough.

. . . Here’s the line-up on CSN’s Celts coverage. We have no idea what wickedgoodsports.com is, but we got there quite logically from the CSN page, so they must be in some kind of cahoots together.

• Go easy on the Matzah and eat your heart out as we indulge in the exquisite Gefilte fish (and no, that’s not an oxymoron) of The Shirl and the hair-raisin’ horseradish of The Phil.

• One last thing and this one’s strictly for the decision-makers at the Flagship Campus of the UMass system: The answer is Derek Kellogg if the question is, “Who can bring the energy back to the Mullins?”

We spent a lot of time around Kellogg this past season and the guy is ready in every conceivable way. Doesn’t matter that he hasn’t had head coaching experience. He’s got UMass roots that run deep. At this point in the Program’s history that has to count for more than “games as a head coach.”

Umie Athletic Director John McCutcheon doesn’t need the Pumps to understand this.

Shots is giving the advice free of charge. Anyone with a pen or a platform is free to take the hint as well: DK is OK for UM.

David Scott writes from a seaside shanty on the shores of Hull, Mass. and can be reached at shotsATbostonsportsmediaDOTcom.

Scott’s first book, with Memphis Coach John Calipari, is scheduled for release in the Fall of 2009.